How does one get into the gay BDSM bottoming and leather scene?Seeking Answers Concerning Kink One shows up, SACK."It's a site where you can create a profile, window-shop for a play buddy, and 'check his references.' Even better, if you can, go to a public event like IML, MAL, or CLAW, or to a play party like the New York Bondage Club, where you can participate in a monitored space with other people around, or just watch the action.Don't forget the motto 'safe, sane, and consensual,' and be sure to have a safe word!(Being a decent human being accounts for the other 110 percent*.) Because if you aren't showing up in kink spaces—online or IRL—your fellow kinksters won't be able to find or bind you. "The leather scene is a diverse place with tons of outlets and avenues, depending on how you navigate your life and learn," said Amp from Watts the Safeword (wattsthesafeword.com), a kink and sex-ed website and You Tube channel.
Great sex and a good friendship make up a solid foundation.
It's been tough—my ex is a great guy, and causing him pain has been a loss on top of my own loss, but I know I did the right thing.
Among other things, our sex life was bland and we had infrequent sex at best. He says he's open to my terms—open/fuck-buddy situation—but things have quickly become relationship-ish.
"Eighty percent of success is just showing up," someone or other once said.
The adage applies to romantic/sexual success as well as professional success, SACK, but showing up easily accounts for 90 percent of success in the BDSM/leather/fetish scene.