Joy, Thanks for your email, as it reveals both some truths and blind spots.Truth: it’s a lot easier to date if you don’t have kids. This just reveals your blind spot – you keep on choosing men without kids.Writes Lori: I’ve been dating someone for about six months.I guess I should change my Facebook “status” to “in a relationship” at some point, so I can stop being considered a “toxic maximizer” every time some guy asks me out.The crowd was a mix of college guys and young professionals. And when the topic of my work came up, I told a small group of guys that I was working on an interesting article that required me to tap real-life guys for their opinions on dating single moms. I would absolutely go on a date with a single mom and see where it could lead.
Perhaps you can recommend a different resource…or you can explain how your comments apply when it comes to dating with children. I went out with a girlfriend in Montclair, NJ, to a fun place called Just Jakes. It was a little deceiving, sure, but I thought telling the guys I was a single mom would influence their answers—and I wanted raw thoughts.It was lovely being out sans Jack, having a cold beer at the bar, surrounded by other adults enjoying drinks, conversation, and music. I videotaped their answers, transcribed what they said, and here’s what I got: “My mom was a single mom most of my childhood, so I have tons of respect for single mothers.That has nothing to do with kids or age or anything. Which brings me to something that I’ve been sitting on for a few months and wanted to share here with you.If you understand 40-year-old men, you pretty much understand 60-year-old men. It’s an update from my friend, Lori Gottlieb, author of “Marry Him,” my favorite relationship book.