Or, try the sincere approach..."this is something that is important to me, can we spend a few minutes each night/week/month sharing our answers" Give him the opportunity to "pass" on questions that make him to uncomfortable.I don't know you or your husband, but I do know that there are NO men that have "no emotions", just many that that lack practice expressing them, for many societal and cultural reasons and both men and women tend to follow an unwritten, gender script, in their conversations that keep these patterns reoccurring. I think that questions like these can make our time together much more interesting and memorable, and people don't always have great conversational skills these days to rely on. The questions will be useful as I restart my social life after a 25 year hiatus. How a person answers these questions would provide a shortcut to knowing a bit about their personal morals and motives which would either, implicitly, quickly put up walls or take them down. But it took us much longer than 45 minutes, which is why we only got halfway. However, he is very willing to push himself to open up. If we have a lull and I want to stir the pot, I'll start a discussion around it. Like one of the previous writers I just came across it and plan to print it.These questions only take about 45 minutes to discuss—and they almost always make two people feel better about each other and want to see each other again, according to social psychology researcher Arthur Aron of the Interpersonal Relationships Lab at Stony Brook University in New York, who published his results in "The Experimental Generation of Interpersonal Closeness" in (1997). Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you're going to say? Now, I'm no psychologist, but as an experienced wife and nagger, I can tell you that every single item on this list would elicit the "yes dear, whatever you think" response, followed by the "I have to go to the bathroom" response, in as little as three minutes, and that within the hour, we'd probably be arguing at the top of our lungs. thanks anyway, and good luck with your facebook campaign!You can try these questions with a date, but they're not necessarily only applicable to fostering romance. :) Helen Hi Helen, I can't argue with you that many men would not have a negative reaction to 36 questions, but not all are that way.You can also try them with people you already know well—friends, family members, even long-term partners—to deepen your ties. I plan on printing two copies of this out and pulling it out on my wife and I's next date night.
What roles do love and affection play in your life? Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. I think you'd need to pick and choose among these questions and see how the conversation went.
Someone who asks in a way I feel is invasive, demanding or not-listening still would not make me feel closer--again, whether it's this list of questions or any other.
Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common. It would depend on how the questions were asked and how our discussion of them went--if they ask in a genuinely interested, open-to-listening way, I'd feel closer, but I'd feel closer if they asked any questions in that way.
I'm probably revealing a lot about my own insecurities through my reactions here :) Which in itself is interesting for me. We did get about halfway through the questions and it was very helpful. Each time I go on a date with my bf, I'm going to pick one and keep it in mind.
I guess the answer to that question depends a lot on the reasons behind what you describe as his reticence.